Bam!

It hit tonight.
Tonight I realized what moving will really do, how it will really affect us and change our lives in so many ways.
We will probably move about 30-45 minutes away from where we are, if not even longer.
That means if my kids want to continue going to church when we move, it will be a 45 minute drive. Awana, long drive. The YMCA, a long drive. The homeschooling co-op we attend, a long drive. My children's friends, a long drive.
OMG! Now I kind of sort of don't want to move. We have set up a life here. We have friends, activities, things to do, places to go, people to see.
We will move just far enough away that it will be so temting to make these drives, for about a week or two. That would mean that given what our weeks look like right now, to get to and from activities, we would spend at least 8 hours in the car and that wouldn't include just getting together to play with friends.
Ugh.
The fact is we can't afford to stay around here. I am so sad now. I mean I guess I knew it would happen, but the implications didn't click until tonight.
I finally felt like I was figuring out this area. I finally started going to church, just got more active in my moms club, joined the y, really started to make friends I could talk to. And now, well, now we will be moving from it all.
:-( I'm sad. I will miss it and I know my children will miss it as well.
Boo hoo hoo.