Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Boo hoo hoo

I don't feel good again. My stomach just got really upset around afternoon today. Blech. I hate this feeling. I just want to not get sick anymore.
Tomorrow I have to go to the dentist for a cleaning as well. I don't want them in my mouth anymore. I'm going to gag. And I know they'll use that gritty toothpaste stuff they use everytime. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up. My mouth is going to be on over-drive tomorrow. Maybe they won't do it all for me if I start to get sick while we are there. If they could just do the scraping part, brush them normal and let me come back in a few months, maybe it will be easier then? I don't know.
I just want to not be sick anymore. That's really all it is. And I admit, one day a week is much better than where I was just a month ago, but it still sucks LOL!!! Of course it didn't help that I stayed up late reading a (really good) book last night either .. I bet that's why I feel icky today.
Aside from that, there is absolutely nothing going on in my life right now. It's kind of sad how boring my life is. It's so hot out during the day that we don't really go out. We did go out late afternoon, but we didn't last that long out there. My 2 year old just doesn't do well in the heat. She gets bright red, can't drink enough water, and gets crabby when we are out there too long. So we minimize it best we can. My 5 year old listened to more of her story - I think she did about 1 1/2 hours total. My 2 year old colored a lot and played with puzzles and read through her books. I wanted to go to the library (I have two books waiting to be picked up) but the kids really didn't want to, and the last thing I want to do is drag unwilling kids to a library where they can throw a tantrum in a place that should be not that loud! LOL! Here's hoping we can get there tomorrow though .. I don't want my holds to be sent back.

And well, that's all that is going on around here. Not much I admit.

Monday, June 27, 2005

I'm back and feeling better ...

At least I'm a lot calmer than I felt last time I posted! Last week was a bad week ... I was feeling very anxious and I just wasn't able to get it under control right away.
Anyway, the weekend was absolutely fabulous I have to say. Saturday we had a wedding to attend. I almost didn't go (becuase I was feeling kind of crabby LOL!) but I did and it was so much fun. I'm so glad that I went. Dh and I talked to some friends we haven't talked to in a while and it was nice to be able to catch up with them. I even danced some and we really did have a great time!
Sunday a relative of ours had a party here so lots of family was here to visit with. A few people stayed late and I hung out with them for a while and it was so much fun! Seriously, it was a blast LOL!
I think as long as the sickness stays away and I can keep the anxiety under control, I will finally have some great days (as proved by this weekend! LOL)

Aside from that, just being mom. My 5 year old amazed me today ... she listened to the first hour of The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe on cd today! I didn't think she would listen for an entire hour, but she did! She wanted to start the second CD too, but we were 10 minutes from bed so I had to tell her no, which she didn't like very much. She is really into this book. She's seen a cartoon version on TV, so it's not entirely new to her, but she told me this is differnt than the movie which I expected LOL! She's just taking to it so well, and I told her we would have to get her more stories on tape/CD from the library (we bought the one she is listening today). For the last 2 weeks, I've been reading her The Mouse and the Motorcycle and she loved it! We will start Runaway Ralph when she's done with her CD's, but I kind of like her litening on tape/cd cuase it saves me voice ROFL!! No, I'll still read to her, but now we'll do some of both I think!
Speaking of amazing things, my 2 year old drew a picture last week that was recognizable! It was a person! I was so impressed! Yeah for her! =) She was so proud of it too! We had to instantly hang it up and hten she drew more to hang up as well LOL! I loved it =)
Okay, that's all for now!

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Doc's today ....

Had an appointment today.
Baby's heartrate was in the 150's. Both my girls were in the 130's. Everything else was fine - bp, wieght, etc, etc.
Apparently I am group b strep positive though. It was in my urine at the initial visit (which was back in April but I was just told today about it.).
I'm not too pleased to hear that. In fact, I'm downright very anxious about it.
Which stinks because all my anxieties are coming back full force it feels like. I have worked so hard since the fall to try to get this under control and it feels like in a blink of an eye, it's back. It sucks really. I'm kind of sick of dealing with it frankly, which you might think is helping, but really I think it's making it worse.
I'm also a bit frustrated with my 2 year old. For the last month she has been having so many problems with bed time. She comes out of her room, she has taken to laying into the hallway. She does it quietly too so mostly you don't know until you are about to step on her. She has also come into our room and tried to get into our bed. One night she did it while I was still awake (not in the room) nad she was so quiet about it, dh didn't wake up. I walked into the dark room and tried to quietly get in bed and of course, crawled right onto my 2 year old.
So last night she was out of her room, again. I found her out there and said "Why are you in the hall? The floor is so hard. you need to go back to bed." And you know what she told me? "I don't like my bed. I want my crib back." Okay, jaw drop. She hasn't had a crib since November I think? And now, now, now, she wants her crib?! And that was all she could talk about today ... she wanted daddy to bring her crib home.
Grrr ... and on top of all of that, she freaked out over everything today. She wouldn't look at anyone, talk to anyone, just clung to me all day. And the people who were over she adores the rest of the time! By the time dh came home I had about all I could take. I left dh with the kids and went to the library. I feel bad getting so frustrated at them, wen really, the issues are mostly mine, but I can't help it. I'm dreading tomorrow. I seriously wish I had a place to drop the kids off for the day. Alas there's none and so tomorrow I will have to suck it all up and try not to be a crabby mom!

Sunday, June 12, 2005

I'm really trying ...

to keep up with this blog. I just don't have the heart right now. Really, I don't have the heart for anything right now honestly.
I'm still really sick .... 14 weeks along and still sick. I really thought that all this sickness stuff would be gone by now. I'm just sick of it. So sick of it.
Nothing much else to say here other than I'm sick, sick, sick.
I went and saw the heart doc. Actually, I went to the ER. The thought that I might have a blood clot. Of course nothing showed up. They sent me for blood work ... checking for thyroid and iron issues. Nothing showed up. Yesterday I had a achocardiogram (sp?). I'll find out Friday if that showed anything ... but I'm going to take a big guess that it shows nothing.
Blah. I'm just in a mood to complain tonight ... that's all I want to do is complain and complain and complain.
I'm wearing maternity clothes now ... started Friday. They are comfy, but I don't own that much for summer and half of what I pulled out I don't even like @@ Of course, cuase I'm not in a mood to like anything right now honestly LOL! But anyway, I'm kind of bummed ... I don't want to go out and spend money on clothes that I will only get to wear until the end of the summer. And my dh insists on getting a vasectemy when this pregnancy is over, which I don't agree with either. But hey, what can I do? When we got married he only wanted 1 child. We will have 3 when this baby is born. So that's a pretty good compromise for him, but I still have my heart set up on 4 kids for this family. Oh well ... really, I shouldn't even think about it right now ... that's still 6 months away ... which sounds sooooooooo long! LOL! I wish it were December already. I really do! LOL!
Okay, enough complaining for now ... I'm sure I'll have more to do another day ROFL!!