Misc Ramblings ...

Hmmm ... I tend to do a lot of that these days ... but anyway ...

things here are going well. I can't believe it's April already though! FTR: not one person in my life played any April Fool's Day jokes on me today, which is good, because I am quite gullible and probably would have believed whatever someone tried to tell me.
Anyway, things here are good.

I got my office in order. (you can see some pictures of it over at http://journeyof1000stitches.blogspot.com if you are so inclined). That felt Wonderful. I mean, just completely wonderful to have the room set-up and ready for me to make lots of great things.

As far as my Bible challenge (reading it in 90 days) that is going well too. I am up to date on my reading ... I am in 1 Samuel now. It's nice to still be on track, although, I'm on only on day 20, but that is almost a third of the way through!

The only bad thing is that my son refuses to nurse. At all. He just stopped nursing on Thursday. Like that. No warning at all. To say I'm very sad about this, well, it might be an understatement. One day, he was nursing away great, the next he cried if I even so much as said the word milk. I know a new tooth has come in. I am secretly hoping it's a nursing strike and tomorrow he'll be back wanting to nurse, but I doubt that will happen. ::sigh:: It's hard to explain how sad I am about this, how sudden it all feels. And how full I actually feel. My body has not caught on to the fact that this part of my life is over. And I really feel like he is just done with it. He never was a great nurser to begin with, never spending enough time eating to be full because he wanted to be running around instead. And it hits me once again, this is it. He is my last child. I will never nurse another child again. And it feels me with a great amount of sadness :-( I cried about it yesterday. I will say my husband was great about it, cuddled with me, agreed it was sad but then tried to point out all the new cute, more grown up things our son is doing. And I really do appreciate it all the new things and the cute things, but I am really struggling to accept we will have no more children. And I think this whole not wanting to nurse thing is making it sting all a bit more.

::sigh:: But tomorrow starts a new week. Hopefully a good week. Full of fun and laughter and wonderful memories. As we celebrate spring and prepare for Easter. Then celebrate with family and friends all that is happening. As the house gets more and more put together, as I get out more with other mothers and women who I can talk to and share with, as we meet new neighbors, and make new friends, while remembering to call the old ones .... my family really is at an exciting time in our life. We are. And I try to remember that and hold onto that feeling. But there is a part of me that is sad and I don't want to ignore that part, but I don't want to dwell on it either ...